What does it mean?

What does it mean to me?

It means that no matter what, I always have to push myself further than before.

It means not giving in to the temptations of failure.

It means, a lot to me to be able to pull my ass of the ground.

The question, "What does climbing mean to you?", is hard to answer. It's opinionated and there is no right or wrong answer. If you can understand that aspect, then you're better off than those who are under the influence that there is a definitive answer to the question. You can insert anything in the place of climbing.

Skateboarding.

Surfing.

Slacklining even.

So many choices and answers.

So ask your self this, what does climbing/skateboarding/surfing/whatever you do mean to you?

Lazy POS

Yes that seems to be the most reoccurring theme in my life.

Rest. Laziness. Call it what you will, it feels the same to me when I don't do a damn thing. Sometimes it feels good or is forced upon myself due to the weather or simple annoyances. Yet, it never fails to remind how boring I can be when left to my own devices. So without further ado, here is a traditional mini top five I've complied in my head from the past couple of days of things that hurt.

Top 5 pain inducing things when bouldering

#1 Micro crimps on plastic in a roof

#2 Awkward shoulder presses

#3 Falling on my head

#4 Falling on my back

#5 Tweaking my fingers out

Bitch bitch bitch. Yes, I do it. You do too. Try and act like you don't.

No one cares.

Lately

I've been thinking. For the past couple of months, I've been feeling stronger and lighter than ever. Even when I trained with a team. I've been eating better, trying harder, and not being as negative as I have been in the past. I've been wondering,

"Why?"

Do you have to have a coach or a team to have any sort of training? I think a coach helps (a good one that is), and teams can provide motivation to train. But when I was training, climbing was starting to feel more monotonous more than the fun it is. I felt like I HAD to train instead of wanting to train. These days I WANT to train and get better. I want to try these hard boulder problems that aren't my style just so I can get out of my comfort zone. I want to train on pinches and slopers so I don't get shut down on problems that have those types of holds. Awkward, big moves, small/tic-tacky moves, intricate moves, balance problems, things that will shut me down.

Most people don't like to work their weaknesses because yes, it is uncomfortable. Failure is a weakness of mine! Christ on a crutch. I used to get mad when I fall. Now if I yell coming off a wall, I'm usually feeling something not a good feeling. Like skin ripping, arms and legs hitting holds or the wall as I fall creating scrapes that hurt for the first five seconds of open arm, those types of annoyances. But I chalk that all up to mental training. If I didn't give up, I say the day was a success. Sure, not doing a problem is frustrating. Especially when you know you can. I've been learning to take that frustration and put that energy and time towards trying a problem again. It's what has lead me to a new found level of focus.

It really started about a month ago when I was trying to do this V10 in the cave at Bridges. It's not my style. It's long, about 24 hands moves (almost half the hand moves on Wheel of Life in the Grampians which Ethan Pringle just completed, YEAH ETHAN!), and slightly beta intensive depending on the set of beta you used. I could have walked away, deeming it too hard and something I'll never do.

I was set.

I HAD to do this thing. There was no question. I either did it or we stripped it before I did it. Simple as that. No excuses. And that has been working. Also having Five Ten shoes under my feet is a a factor to my training. Hey, good shoes that fit comfortably help you climb harder and smarter. Also not creating bullshit excuses for myself and gripping reality has been a key factor for my head game. It's been helping with doing something I like to call One Tries. Basically, I work the shit out of a problem and when I feel it, I tell my self, "One try. That's it." I don't mean it, but it creates this feeling of competition within myself (or I could be bullshitting and have no idea what I'm saying). Pretty much, it's like this:

A: You either do it first try and are done with it

or

B: You have more work to do

Try it. It might work.

And on the fifth day

I said enough resting, it's time to climb.

And the plastic rock gods said, today son! Yes I'm back climbing or Way Lake training as I am no preparing for Way Lake in two weeks. Way Lake sits in Mammoth, CA. About two hours away from Bishop. It is by no means a world class destination. But the rock is good, almost Rocky Mt. like (I don't know what Rocky is like cause I haven't been yet).

The training includes...V10, V8, V8 for projecting and 21 bouldering problems to be completed on my birthday (July 6th) in the cave during forerunning as part of the impromptu birthday bouldering challenge. 21 boulder problems from V0-V10. And then next day I sleep and rest, getting ready for some actual rock climbing away from the Bay Area. I have three days on. THREE. One two THREE fools. When I was in Hueco I went this many days on and did about 35 problems v0-v10 so about 70 problems in 6 days. Easy to hard. Most people there would go one day on and two days off. That method usually entailed the following excuses:

#1 "I had a bad burrito. It had this weird green yellow stuff mixed in it" (You're in El Paso. It's not bad they're GOOD burritos. And that green stuff? Those were Avocados.)

#2 "I'm weak"

#3 "I didn't wake up in time for the gates"

#4 "I've got this gapping hole and I like to whine"

It was amazing how much people could complain about minuscule things. Then again, don't we all complain (pain anyone?)

For now, I'm not complaining. I'm not in pain, and I feel really good. Hopefully the mental training of repeated failure and not getting mad has worked. Or maybe the Crank! Forearm fuel does it's job and keeps me feeling the pump longer so I can climb longer. I think it does. Buy some. It's good. Basically it's just a FUCK-LOAD of vitamin B in powder form. Mi it with a Gatorade and you got some good shit right there! PROBAR bars help as well for giving me some sort of food while Im climbing without weighing me down or feeling sluggish.

BUY THOSE PRODUCTS!

All about how much pain you're willing to take

"...I already have enough pain in my life, I don't need anymore from bouldering." - Joe Czerwinski & Chris Bloch

And for me? It's very little.

Yes, I'll admit this fact that, I'm kind of a bitch when it comes to pain. Mostly dull pain that goes away and comes back. Throbbing pains as well.

Right now I'm sitting here with a pressure pain in my right big toe. It wasn't ingrown, as originally thought, and was filled with blood and puss. Disgusting. Skipping the details, the pressure and swelling have gone down quite a lot from Thursday evening at Bridges. So instead of being out of climbing for two or more weeks, I'm only out for a week now. Good time to either take a full week off or go do hang board and campusing at Oakland. I have no idea yet. Playing it by ear really.

Healing up watching the Giants

But before this mess, I have been climbing consistently better and harder. My mouth isn't running at willing spewing multiple F bombs when I fall (except for last night, that hurt to fall on my foot), I've been forcing myself to try harder problems that do not suit me, and I've been dealing with failure a lot better than I normally have in the past. If I look back a year ago, I was no where near the level I am today. I was completely fooling myself that I was at a level I thought I should be at. But I was trapped into a comfort zone and subconsciously fooled myself into thinking I was somewhat okay. When you have friends, by the likes of Dan Portik, Nick Ashley, Will Rathvongsa, the people I set with, you tend to try and better yourself and be a better person.

And After a week, I believe I will have caught up on sleep and let my fingers feel better. This is my body saying you need a break. So I'm listening to it. Some people have told me rest makes you stronger. While I try to keep this in mind, it's hard to get immediate results and that's what is frustrating to most people. We are a society than wants things now. To get stronger, faster, smarter, to look skinnier and fit. It takes time. Climbing is something that you can't just jump in and expect to be climbing hard right away. You gotta build up technique and strength. You succeed through failure, meaning the more times you fail and pay attention to what is not working you'll learn and and overcome your mistakes and send.

Its coming, it's coming, it's coming

The heat is coming.

That's California for you. During the day it's hot as shit, and nights are colder. And if you're anything like myself, you have to pack a backpack with jeans and a light sweatshirt for the nights while you're wearing shorts and a tank-top during the day time, sweating your ass off. Oh well. It's life here. You learn very quickly how to deal with the heat.

The heat also means a lot of outside areas are too hot to climb at. Infested with bugs, hot during the day...so many little nuisances. Castle Rock season is done till the fall. Yosemite is being invaded by drones of tourists and bugs on the valley floor. Bishop is, of course, hot as balls. But Way Lake (about one hour north of Bishop) is good in the summer months. The only time it is not covered in snow. Pretty much a summer destination. Pretty cool. That means there is year round climb on the east side. Plus you have Tuolumne Meadows as well, sitting higher in elevation than Yosemite Valley's floor

. Mickey's Beach is pretty good year round if you check the tides and weather before hand. If you climb in the Bay Area, you're pretty much screwed and have to take every chance you can to get outside, wherever you're psyched on. Otherwise, you're stuck inside training. That's not the worst option either. You get stronger for the fall and winter seasons. Keep projects in your mind helps you stay psyched.

I have a two week break from setting bouldering problems for the good people at Bridges Rock Gym. They're really what has helped the gym flourish and be a better place to climb. The non-competitive nature of members and the willingness to go get it. It feels like a well run skate park. Like The Berrics. People there always seem to keep it fun. Even with the Battle At the Berrics, it always seems like they're having fun.

I've traveled around to other gyms and places and I have always seen little groups and pods of people. And it's a weird feeling to see these and get the stares as you climb on your own; as they look and you can hear them all hush hush, but as soon as you glance they're way they shut their mouths. Very odd. Very...unfriendly. I guess there is sort of a "Locals Only" mentality with these people. Lame.

Not at Bridges. Sure we have our group of friends, but we'll extend out and include you in with us and climb with you. Doesn't matter if you just started or a professional. Unless you're a total douche-bag to people, cockier than a porno, or spray way too much about yourself (which falls into the cocky and douche-bag categories in my mind), we'll say hi and climb with you. There is no locals only bullshit. That's always been slightly lame. Do your homework before you go to a spot and don't kook it.

Be yourself.

Wednesdays

I feel as if Wednesdays are the best days now I get to rest from the previous day of setting and my skin appreciates that. It also appreciates Climb On! bars. It's not spray if you love a product. I had never tried this till last year and won't go back to not using it. It helps my skin heal virtually overnight (cause I put it on my hand when I go to bed). If your skin tends to dry out when climbing and sting the next day climbing again, try some of this and see what happens you'll be amazed.

There are 31 new boulder problems on the North Boulder at Bridges as of 4:30pm yesterday. V0-V10. One word: QUALITY. We are finding our groove and flow. It's completely different than any other place. The Spot, The Front, east coast gyms...there is no standard for setting. Each gym has it's own consistency that makes it because as route setters, we are creating a product of the gym for people. There are somethings I like about other gyms setting and somethings I don't. That's just how it's going to be with everyone. You can't like everything about everything. You have to have somethings you like and dislike or you would have no taste. And call me an asshole or a dick, it's just the way I see things. I don't claim to know everything and never will about one subject. You can't. It's virtually impossible to attain that much knowledge in your lifetime.

Ah, ranting...one of many things I could do for hours. Moving on though...

I did something to my hamstring*. It's not pulled because I can walk still and I wasn't on the ground bawling my eyes out. Hopefully it is just a strain and if I stretch and drink water today while I rest, then I should be okay, right? In theory anyways.

*Hamstring is better to climb on. Just need to stretch before doing heel hooks. Or just stretch out after warming up now. Curse growing older...

Weekend Update

Here is a breakdown of the weekend.

Friday…

Good day. Really good. Skin didn't suck and I was able to go complete some boulder problems at work. I saw my buddy Dan Portik stick a backflip on a slackline. Insane amount of trying and getting the focus. He is psyched. He's a climber who can slackline, and has a life (like completing grad school). Most slackliners today JUST slackline. I feel that you really need a balance to keep sane, because when you become overly involved in something the passion gets mixed with it being a job. It sounds fun, but unless you are prepared for the hard work and time, it becomes the worst thing in the world. I got a box of PROBAR, two boxes from them. I am so psyched on these. It will help eliminate the need for a complete meal while climbing and and I can take these on the go, severely reducing my waste and impact. So instead of sandwhich and multiple bags, I just have a wrapper or two. And they're much healthier for you and taste much better than a candy bar (Thanks PROBAR!). I'm also very motivated to get back to Mickey's Beach next Thursday before low tide in the morning. I would like to try the other problems there and retry Orange Buddha the ways I have seen in the video to see for myself if that makes it harder. It's one of my new favorite places to go boulder (maybe route climb since there are some cool looking lines there as well). Kind of old school meets new. It's also also right on the ocean. I like the mountains, but I'm a California boy, and I love that great big expanse we call the ocean. It's wild and calm all at once. Eat your heart out Boulder, CO fools with your shit weather in the winter and mountains, I'll take the ocean over you. But the rest of Colorado I'm down with.

Saturday…

My iPhone had been giving me problems. It wouldn't stay on vibrate and switch back on forth between vibrate and ring spontaneously and it was slightly annoying for about 6 months. Kind of a mellow rest day. The heat has really taken over the East Bay, so resting in a dark room when I'm not out and about is probably my best option. As long as I keep from burning up I feel comfortable in the heat. Out with jeans during the day. It's time to wear shorts. Finally!

Sunday…

Last rest day before I strip the North Boulder at work tomorrow.

Matt Burbach on the North Boulder 2009

Ever wake up feeling tired? That's me today.

Summer

The heat has come.

Hard and fast. It sucks. A lot. I think I got in on the last good day for Castle till the bugs and heat subside. Until that time, I will be looking at my guide books reading about future problems that sound cool to try. I do remember there are a FUCK LOAD of problems I want to do in Yosemite this year. And Bishop. I can not WAIT to get back out there in the cooler temps. Even in the summer at night is amazing. Headlamps and easy highballs in Buttermilks. Way Lake is a go for this summer. I feel stronger and more ready this time around than being in the snow and hating the fact that I couldn't walk without sliding ten feet back down. That's slightly frustrating. I wish I had boots or something so I could walk in snow. Oh well. Not a lot to do about that.

My buddy Ben Eastman and I went out to Mickey's Beach Thursday. Mickey's has sport and bouldering and sit about one mile due south from the little beach town of Stinson Beach. Normally I sleep when I try to go bouldering at beach areas. I want to boulder but somehow, it ends up too warm with no breeze. But it was prime conditions. Not too warm, slightly breezy, the rock wasn't wet...PERFECT. It was just us and another group of two on their honeymoon from SoILL (not the company but from southern Illinois). Ben got me motivated to get up some shit there. A first for putting on my shoes at a beach area.

Ben Eastman (BE)

The one thing I was excited about was the classic arete problem, Orange Buddha Arete. Something looked askew. After returning to Bridges, it was confirmed that the boulder that created the pit you sat into was missing. This missing rock made the problem substantially much less awkward, eliminating all chances of dabbing backwards.*

video still of myself doing Orange Buddha Arete

I would like to go back and try some more boulder problems soon. The long traverse and theres something that Ben did a couple years ago on small, thin holds that LOOKS doable, but convincing myself I could hold on long enough is challenging in its self. Good to have things to come back for.

*I really have NO clue about the grade and just went with the guidebook (which I feel could be better in the future if someone took the time to revise it). I think I skipped some holds or something. If you watch and see something I did wrong or missed, let me know and I'll go back and try it a different way.

How much do I care?

None.

Somethings I care a lot about. My girlfriend, my friends, my self, my climbing abilities. Probably more of the later more than I should cause I've gotten angry when I fall which I call BULLSHIT on. Either way, my head seems to be full of complaints and nonsensical negativity. All I really worry about and work on is suppressing my anger and not letting things slip in my filter. It's fucking hard. Oh well.

SUCK IT UP SALLY!

ANYWAYS....Monday was a nice, slow, relaxing climbing day at Castle Rock with my friends Will and Elese. Despite the hoards of people (mostly non-climbing). I was able to get my sorry-ass up Hueco Wall once more. Not before my body decided I didn't need the skin on my index knuckle. First try hurt, and the moss didn't help by adding a funky green color to look like gangrene on my fingers. And I got beta for the Sharma Traverse from Cyril. It was a good day. It was topped off with a burrito and ceviche that put me to sleep for the rest of the night. Lights out. Pretty much knocked me the FUCK OUT!

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